How to Survive the End of the World PART 1: How to kill a zombie the right way

Welcome! This will be a multi-part series titled "How to Survive the End of the World." It deals with handling and surviving various end of the world scenarios. Zombies, giant monsters, meteors, vampires, etc. If you are one of my Facebook friends, you should probably know about this already. The first handful of parts in this series I will be revising, editing, and reposting here in this blog.

Zombies. Good lord, so many people always imagine the end of the world as a zombie outbreak. They are nothing new. Recently, zombies have evolved from simple corpses rising from the graves, to something caused by a virus, disease, or something else possibly man-made. So, when the zombies finally do rise, how are we going to stay alive, and more importantly, beat them back into their graves?

Okay, okay, technically zombies cannot be "killed" since they are already dead. But you can "kill" their bodies, since that's all there is.

Weak spots on a zombie:  The head, and the joints, mainly the knees, elbows and shoulders.

The head: No matter what anyone tells you, the ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY ONLY way to kill a zombie is to hurt the brain. This means powerful blunt blows strong enough to crack the skull, and anything from bullets to icepicks that will pierce the skull and squishy brain beneath. Or, you could slice right through its cranium with a blade I guess.

There are also the eyes. Take these out, and the zombie is blind. This can be a good, or a bad thing. Good, because zombie will become blind and cannot see you. Bad because there is a chance said blind zombie will go berserk. 

Joints: It's simple, aim for the joints, especially if a zombie is carrying any kind of weapon. Even if they are undead and cannot feel pain, if the joint breaks, it breaks, and they cannot use it. See where I'm going here? In other words, whenever you engage a zombie in melee combat (and for whatever reason you're not targeting the head) do not, for the love of God, do not do not aim for the torso! That is meat, lifeless meat! No matter what you hit there, if will not do crap to a zombie. The only organ that has any influence on a zombie is the brain, and breaking any of the bones in the torso will not stop its undead, limbs with their limitless supply of energy from pressing on. Aim for the joints instead, please.

 Weak spots are covered, not let's talk about some really big no nos.

Fire
Let me just first make clear that if you plan on ever using fire to attack a zombie, for any reason, you are not allowed to be in my survivor group.You see, when you set a person or animal on fire, they go crazy. They run around panicking like a chicken with it's head cut off, and anything in its way will get burned. Zombies are like that, but they feel no pain and thus, do not panic. Instead, they are a walking wall of fire. Good job, smarty, I hope you have a firearm on you other than a flamethrower.

Zombies do not feel pain, and their flesh is already dead and decaying. You think even if they did feel pain they would care? They know they're rotting and won't last long. Fire is just a catalyst. So the next time you see a zombie, and you see a flame, try your very best to keep the two separate.

Using crossbows
Man, what the heck is up with people wanting to pick up a crossbow and use it when it comes to the end of the world? They do it all the time in shows and movies.

Crossbows. Suck.

If you want to use a bow weapon, use a bow! Geez, crossbows are large, heavy, clunky, and take long to load unless you have a snazzy futuristic crossbow that reloads after each shot. I don't care if its composite, or what it is made out of, if I see a crossbow during a zombie outbreak, I will burn it. That, or I will rip it apart and use its parts for whatever else. Use a bow, seriously. They're normally lighter, smoother, fires faster, and just feels smoother and easy than a crossbow. And do not get one with a dumb scope on it, a simple longbow will more than suffice.

Still, though, unless it's your last option, I don't recommend bows for attacking zombies at all.

Punching zombies
Do not punch a zombie. Who do you think you are, Rocky Balboa? Unless you're an experienced boxer, martial artist, or have proper armor (see below), do not punch a zombie. Why?

When you punch a zombie, you should only be aiming at the head. That means your whole arm will be within biting reach of the zombie, even if for just a second or two. Do not take that chance. If you get bit, you are screwed. Screwed! Not to mention, if horror films have taught us anything, zombies will be shuffling around with their arms waving about. That means you will have to make it past those before punching it.

Enough with the bad things. How about a good tip or two?

Minimal Armor:
This is bare minimal protection you should have. Later, I will have another note with some pictures on advanced armor anyone can easily make from anything in their house.

I am not saying don a whole suit of armor like a knight or anything, but you need proper armor. Well, what are you defending against? Bites. Human bites. That is really your only big concern, as I believe a scratch from a zombie will not infect you. It's simple: use layers.

To protect your head, wear a helmet. A simple bicycle helmet is perfect. Just make sure it has secure straps and fits well. Motorcycle helmets are better, as they protect your entire head, including your eyes. Only drawback is they limit you peripheral view.

For your neck and throat, just use a scarf. Just make sure it does not hang low. You can also use a large choker, just make sure it is not too tight.

Torso and arms: Get about two or three light, thin, short sleeved shirts, and put all of them on. Yes, proper armor will be uncomfortable, but get over it.

Next, do the same with long sleeved shirts, preferably light, thin, long sleeved shirts. Put at least two on over the short sleeved shirts. This way, if your arms ever catches fire or whatever, it will be this much easier to remove the dangerous clothing.

You can also use thick clothes as well, especially in the winter and late fall. Make sure they can breathe, though, and are at least a little stretchy.

Hands: Use a flexible, sturdy pair of gloves that have a good grip. Leather works, so does rubber and sturdy yard gloves. Just make sure you can still work your hands very easily with them on.

As for your legs, simple pair of jeans should do. Normal jeans that don't have tears or wholes in them, that is. You will really only have to protect your legs if the zombies are below you, but still standing.

For footwear, either a good pair of boots or running shoes will do. It really depends on the terrain and what you are more accustomed to.


That's all I got for now folks. How to kill a zombie. Running away and evading them....not hard. You just, uh, I don't know run, and avoid zombies. Easier then you think. I would recommend at least very simple, basic parkour training. Or free running, whatever.

Later.

New workout routine

In order to properly prepare for an outbreak of any sort of monsters, or any sort of apocalypse, I must train my body to become strong!

But in all seriousness, I have always been pretty slim and fit, but I'm still dreadfully weak. Now that my Summer and most of my Fall is going to be free, it's time for a newer, stricter, workout routine!

Workout Routine:

Mondays: Biceps, triceps, chest, and abs.
Tuesdays: Shoulders, traps, back, and abs.
Wednesdays: Legs, and abs.
Thursdays: Abs. Mostly a day of rest, though.
Fridays: Biceps, triceps, and abs.
Saturdays: Shoulders, traps, back, and abs.
Sundays: Legs, and abs. Less strict these days, though, a bit more rest.

I have also started jogging about three to five times a week in the early evenings with my dogs. Rule #1 of Zombieland: Cardio.

This workout routine keeps me from overtraining, which anyone can do easily. I had been overtraining a couple parts of my body for a while now, and have finally stopped. It also ensures my whole body get exercised. Lord knows my legs are weak and pathetic.

On top of all of that, I am by far eating much healthier. I'm actually drinking lots of water, in fact mostly water everyday. When I snack late I night, I snack on healthy things like fruits and veggies....most of the time....I have almost replaced normal milk with Silk brand coconut milk, except for cooking and cereal. That stuff has more calcium than milk, less calories, and tastes just great!

I am currently on day 5 of my new workout routine, having started on Thursday, 7/7/11. But, I have been continuing my new healthy "diet" for the past three weeks.

In the beginning.....

....of this blog, there was a guy, a subspecies of human known only as "nerds." He did not know how this would turn out, and he honestly had no clue what he was getting himself into as this is his first blog ever. Most nerds are laughed at, and most really don't care. But he knew one thing, and that was to always be prepared.

You see, nerds tend to believe in things that "don't exist," and think about things that could "never happen." This one nerd in particular has made it his goal to be ready for the unknown, no matter what, and he wishes to share and expand on his knowledge with the world.

But in all seriousness, hello and welcome to my blog! My name is Nick. Most of you probably know me from Facebook or some other social place on the internets. If you are a friend from Facebook, you may or may not be aware of my series of notes titled: "How to Survive the End of the World." Well I've decided to expand on that, but not just that. Here on this blog, you will also find:

-Reviews of movies, games, books, tv shows, maybe even some music. I am very open to suggestions.
-Rants about different things I care about, mostly nerdy things.
-Many things Disney. Look, I'm just a big Disney fan, so this is just a warning. I'm a big fan, but I'm not a fanatic, so it will be under control.

So yeah, tell me what you think about the new blog. There is currently a poll you can find at the top right of your screen.

Here's to a well blogging experience, lol!